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Thanks for sharing your experiences in school. I do and will draw on your experience as my children grow.


What an infuriating experience. Ugh! I'm glad his teacher had your back.

I'm taking this all in for future reference...


ugh...been there done that...it does get easier (for everyone involoved) - mine is now 10 and is better able (more equipped) to handle quite a few of these on her own now (knowing that we have her back and will be there for her at any time)...unless it comes from an adult and then I eat them up for lunch!LOL j.k.


This makes me both sad and angry. But thank God for that blessed teacher.


Hmm...I'm just wondering how Abenezer's teachers here in Italy would handle such a situation given that there isn't as much social awareness here and people tend to pooh-pooh racist gestures or remarks. My son is the ONLY black kid in his school.


Glad to hear the teacher handled it and didn't try to brush it off. Good for her.

It is sad but unfortunate that your son is already experiencing this stereotype at such a young age. And as far as the parents, even at a Republican Convention, the kids will be close to the parents, not really mingling with the general population. Hmm, I bet mom or dad said it.



I need help, I'm the one who wrote I wonder how Abenezer's teachers would handle something like this and IT HAPPENED this week.

My son is pacific and has thus far gotten A in behaviour, well, a few things have happened that weren't "normal" behaviour for him but now make sense.

He was put in detention for spitting on another kid a few weeks ago, he missed his mark, the kid he wanted to spit on was mocking him, so Abe said. We found out yesterday, he told him he is BROWN LIKE S**T! When prodded, Abe admitted it's not the first time and that's why about a month ago, he decided he didn't want to be black anymore. The fifth graders are name-calling - they call him Calimero. For non-Italians, Calimero is a black chick that's on a detergent commercial, who becomes yellow after being washed in that washer detergent.

The teachers have told Abe, We are the same (um...he is not the same, he is black and the other kids are white, he is adopted, and as far as I know he's the only one). They had a talking to the foul-mouthed kid.

I then told others about these episodes and everyone, including the psychologist and social worker in our adoptive parents group all said, it's not racism, it's kids being ugly kids...not...it's racism.

How do I give Abe the strength to fight this (with words - spitting is not allowed, no matter how annoying the other kid is)? I told him to reply to the kid that this kid must like S**T better than chocolate because Abe is brown like chocolate not S**t. I was told by the adoptive parents group that I shouldn't be instigating my kid to name call....

I would personally beat up the other kid, but alas Italian laws do not allow it....

any help is greatly appreciated,
desperate white Mamma


Oh wow, I too am keeping this for future reference. and Anna, can you find another school or can you homeschool in Italy? If they are unwilling to take care of the problem, yes your child has to deal with situations but if no one is supportive, I don't think you can have your child in that situation. good luck Anna, and Amanda I hope it is okay that I responded to anna.

I am so glad that Sparkles teacher was supportive and you are so excellent and handling these situations. thank you for sharing, and I am so sorry this happened.

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